Christ Church

God Can’t Lie (CCD)

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INTRODUCTION

We’re in the time of year where you’re likely to have attended a graduation. As parents and grandparents look on their children, the emotions in the arena likely range wildly. Pride, fear, hope, disappointment, maybe a touch of doubt. “He chose to major in Klingon?” The older generations are prone to be skeptical of the generation who is about to take their place. But in the Christian Church, we aren’t to simply wish that the next generation “makes it.” Paul lays out a plan for creating a culture of faith & good works that will last for eternal ages, because God said we should and promised it would work.

THE TEXT

Paul, a servant of God, and an apostle of Jesus Christ, according to the faith of God’s elect, and the acknowledging of the truth which is after godliness; In hope of eternal life, which God, that cannot lie, promised before the world began; But hath in due times manifested his word through preaching, which is committed unto me according to the commandment of God our Saviour; To Titus, mine own son after the common faith: Grace, mercy, and peace, from God the Father and the Lord Jesus Christ our Saviour. […] Titus 1:1-16

SUMMARY OF THE TEXT

Paul’s opening establishes the basis for all authentic Christian ministry. Notice the clauses: according to faith, acknowledgement of the truth, in hope of eternal life, which is declared through preaching, and Paul is doing so by God’s commandment (vv1-3). This is a personal letter to Titus, a fellow-partaker of the triune blessing of grace, mercy, and peace authorizing him to act with Paul’s apostolic authority (v4); we learn that Paul has a particular assignment for Titus to “set in order” the church in Crete, and to do so by a counter-cultural project of raising up godly elders throughout the island (v5). These men must be identified not only by their own character, conduct, and doctrinal fidelity, but also by the condition of their marriage & children (vv6-9).

These exemplary men will stand in stark contrast to the disorderliness of the Jewish deceivers who were causing the subversion of entire households, and going along with the infamous unruliness of Cretan culture (vv10-12). Titus is tasked with going toe-to-toe with these unruly men, in order that they might be reformed or silenced, while not giving an inch to either Jewish fables or tedious, man-made morality (vv13-14). This massive undertaking can be done only by purity of life & conduct. These compromised leaders are worse than useless in this reformation project (vv15-16).

GENERATIONAL FAITHFULNESS

As the world swirls the drain, the temptation is to shake your head in disgust, shrug your shoulders, and assume there is nothing you can do about it. The temptation which many Christians of our day are succumbing to is to presume that the church’s best days are behind her. They don’t say, as Elisha said, “Where is the Lord God of Elijah?” They assume that faithfulness from one generation to another isn’t possible. They have many biblical instances to point to. Eli’s scoundrel sons, Samuel’s wayward sons. Rehoboam failing to maintain the glory which David & Solomon had procured. Joshua’s warnings at the end of his life seem to be forgotten by Israel shortly after his death. Even back to Eden, Adam was God’s son, who had left his father’s house to be united to his wife; the test in Eden was how would this son do out on his own. The answer to that question was a disaster.

Paul, nearing the end of his life & ministry, writes to his two closest assistants (Timothy & Titus) and gives them a pointed commission to not fumble at the goal-line. As the Old world was passing away with all its shadows, Paul is like a New Testament Moses, commissioning NT Joshua’s to be faithful in life & doctrine. The church was fanning out in conquest of the world, and this conquest would be successful if faithful men faithfully lived and preached the Gospel, and taught others to do so. Paul expected that even in the most unruly culture, this strategy would be effective. Believe the Gospel, live out the Gospel, and preach the Gospel

Titus was a Gentile convert who had been quite the utility player for Paul’s missionary efforts (2 Tim. 4:10). Paul points to him (Gal. 2:3) as an example of a faithful Gentile convert despite not having received the OT covenant sign of circumcision. The Cretan Jews who were bringing in a whole cornucopia of false doctrines/traditions of men, might make a claim to the promises of God, but they only have the husk and not the pith. Titus is the true inheritor of God’s eternal promise, by faithfulness to God’s promise. Titus was no stranger to dealing with difficult pastoral problems (2 Cor. 8:32); but this assignment of reforming Cretan culture was not a weekend project. It was multigenerational (Cf. 2:1-8, 2 Tim. 2:2 Ex. 18).

AUTHORITY IN ACTION

Authority is not a whip to get people to do what you want, it is a tool which must be used to build something. Authority is so often misused because those in office see it as something with which to get what they desire. We see this in the description of the unruly leaders currently infecting the believers of Crete. Their greed, indulgence, and infatuation with fables was causing the demolition of entire households. By contrast, Christian homes, with the elder’s setting the pace, should demonstrate that godly authority builds up something which their subordinates are glad to contribute to & be around.

Titus is to silence the false teachers. This is done by holding fast to the faithful Word. True authority submits to God’s authority. This refutation is not to be done passively: as if just mowing your lawn regularly is enough to spread “Gospel presence”. It is done as godly elders create a contrast between the fruitfulness of their own life & household with the fruitlessness of the unruly. It also means a godly elder will need to actually pick fights. He should, by sound doctrine, exhort & convince gainsayers, and shut up the unruly and vain-talkers. We’ll see another instance in the next chapter that this godly exercise of authority is to be passed on to the next generation. This counter-cultural project, however, isn’t anarchy, it is submission, holding fast to the Word of the God who can’t lie.

BEFORE THE WORLD BEGAN

There is a line in the opening that might sneak by us, but which needs to be central to our minds as we work through this epistle: “In hope of eternal life, which God, that cannot lie, promised before the world began.” The divine covenant of God’s redeeming purpose forms the basis for your certainty that you can walk in godliness. This is nothing other than Paul restating Christ’s prayer for us: “Father, I will that they also, whom thou hast given me, be with me where I am; that they may behold my glory, which thou hast given me: for thou lovedst me before the foundation of the world (Jn. 17:24).”

Cretan culture came with a gravitation pull toward a specific set of sins. Paul affirms this pagan prophet’s insight, and the authority of it. But the underlying redemptive message reveals that the Cretan concrete isn’t fully set. The ship can be turned. Titus, along with faithful elders and the saints they shepherd can be a rudder of generational reformation. This is possible because of God’s eternal promise.

GOD OUR SAVIOR

Central to the success of this project is the good news. Cretans may have been an unruly bunch. Lies may have been their currency. Entire households may be enchanted by the fanciful tales of carnal leaders. But Paul, multiple times in this epistle gives Titus the secret ingredient to setting all this in order: God is our Savior (Cf. 1:3, 4; 2:10, 13; 3:4,6). It’s worth pointing out that God our Savior & Christ our Savior are used interchangeably.

Have you made a mess of things? Are things in your home, or life, or culture unruly, disordered, and tangled? Has your sin become so notorious as to become proverbial? Are you like the person described in verse 16, professing knowledge of God, but contradicting it by your lifestyle? Paul’s message to Titus is to set in order the Cretan believers by bringing this sound doctrine to bear upon their lives. God is our Savior. Cretans are liars, but God does not lie. False teachers feign knowledge of God, but deny Him by their sinful works; but God can’t lie. His promise, covenanted in eternity, was to be your Savior. This is the Gospel, God takes dead men, and makes them live. God takes unruly cultures and sets them in order. God takes things that are formless and void, and fills them with light and life, and this life is in His Son, who cannot fail in this task, Christ our Savior.

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Marriage and the World’s End (Get Married & Stay Married #5)

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INTRODUCTION

Perhaps you’ve watched a skilled artist at work. You watch them paint or carve or shape, moving their hands in ways you can’t, creating something you couldn’t. Then they do something so drastic that you think they’ve ruined the whole thing. That stroke of color was too much. That chiseled off too much marble. That marred the shape of the clay. But somehow it still ends up remarkable. Or think of the skilled cook who bakes & frosts, assembles & garnishes a wonderful spread. Then he invites the guests to dig in, seemingly ruining all the hard work. God is guiding history from one glory to the next. We live in the bright glory of Christ’s resurrection. However, we’re awaiting the final consummation of all things, where this present glory will give place to an eternal weight of glory.

THE TEXT

And I John saw the holy city, new Jerusalem, coming down from God out of heaven, prepared as a bride adorned for her husband (Rev. 21:2).

For as a young man marrieth a virgin, so shall thy sons marry thee: and as the bridegroom rejoiceth over the bride, so shall thy God rejoice over thee (Isa. 62:5).

SUMMARY OF THE EVENTS

There is something in a wedding that portends the end of the world. Secularists foretell that the world shall end, billions of years from now, either in a slow, cold demise, or a cataclysmic fiery meltdown. The Climate Activists tell us that the world will end in starvation, misery, and breakdown.

These texts, along with numerous others, reveal to us how the world will really end: marriage bells. A gloriously adorned bride, free of all flaw. A mighty Bridegroom, rejoicing and beaming with delight over His bride. An eternal covenant, which cannot and will not be broken or transgressed. A sweet consummation of fellowship free from sin, brimful of God’s great love, with no sorrow or sighing to be heard of.

John’s description is that of New Jerusalem walking down the aisle, as it were. The church made complete, coming to rest in the arms of her beloved Savior. Along the same lines, Isaiah uses the picture of the returning exiles of Israel to describe the end of the world, and he uses marital language as well to describe it. The sons would delight in the land of promise, as if marrying it. While even better, God would rejoice over His people like a bridegroom delights in His bride.

WHAT IS MARRIAGE? WHAT IS IT FOR?

If this be the case, the question arises: does your marriage (or your pursuit of marriage) preach a true or false Gospel? Hookups, porn, divorce, adultery, gay mirage, kink, polygamy, violent actions, and profane language/arguments are all ways of taking the Gospel glory which ought to be displayed in marriage and falsifying it. If marriage is to be a picture of Christ & the church, married Christians, or Christian singles who are pursuing marriage should ask whether they are presenting a faithful portrait of the end of the world.

There are two things which make a marriage what it is. A marriage is a solemn, lifelong vow between one man & one woman which is then consummated. You can have a vow that is never consummated, but that is more like roommates or business partners. You can also consummate without vows, but that is like trying to plant a garden in the middle of Times Square. It’s oxymoronic to speak of “redefining marriage.” You might as well speak of replacing the sun, or rearranging the constellations, or refilling the ocean.

BUILDING AROUND A BONFIRE

The WCF gives a helpful three-fold purpose for marriage: companionship, propagation of godly children; and in this fallen world, a curb against uncleanness. The order matters. The first tells us that we are not made for the isolation pods. God made us for fellowship (with Him and each other) (Cf. Gen. 2:18); marriage is ground zero for loving thy neighbor. The second teaches us that this marriage union is to be physical & fruitful (Mal. 2:15). It is to increase fellowship, not decrease it.

The third one is, perhaps, easily misunderstood; it might make us think, wrongly, that God is a repressive kill-joy. Rather, marriage is a safeguard against the misery of uncleanness (1 Cor. 7:2, 9). The misery which marriage guards us from is that of fatherless children, aborted unborn, an unending drumbeat of guilt for shameful deeds, the grief that is divorce, the impossibility of fruitful unions.

The modern world is full of smoldering ruins. The belief is that your momentary pleasure is central to your existence. this conviction is like thinking the best foundation for building your life is a napalm fire of sexual indulgence. The culture then wonders why the framing keeps catching fire, the concrete keeps getting charred, and the plumbing keeps melting. The marriage vows are the foundation, framing, and roof. The consummation is like the sturdy fireplace.

MEN ARE LINEAR, WOMEN ARE CIRCULAR

Marriage can only be constituted between one man and one woman. This is because marriage isn’t something which can be built using outsourced parts and a good bit of duct-tape. Man has been given a mandate (Gen. 1:28) and a Great Commission (Mt. 28:19-20). In both instances, we see that God intended husband & wife together to serve the task in their respective ways.

Men are linear. They must have a mission to pursue, a problem to solve, a rival to subdue, a challenge to overcome. Meanwhile women are circular. They must have a brood to gather in, a flock to nurture, a rhythm to dance to, a garden to fill & beautify.

Problems arise when husbands want their wives to be linear, and wives want their husbands to be circular. Men are to go out like a rocket, but wives are to draw them in again. Wives are to encircle their home, but a husband must lead his family forward so the encircling doesn’t become a smothering.

THE WORLD TO COME

God is orchestrating history towards a wondrous denouement. Christ dwelling with the church in unbroken joy, uninterrupted love, and unthreatened peace. Eden not only restored, but glorified. Eden was the seed, the New Jerusalem is the ever fruitful tree.

Lewis once gave the example of trying to describe for a child the delight which a married couple enjoy in their physical union. The child would still prefer chocolate. He can’t comprehend a joy that he isn’t yet ready for. This is what earthly marriage is. It is a preliminary joy intended to ready the church for the joy beyond the shadows. Real joy. God is like that artist which we began with. He has given us this glorious thing called marriage, and yet He assures us that it will soon be supplanted by the True Marriage.

The joy which you shall partake of in eternity isn’t contained by mere moments & glimpses. The hymn gets it spot on when it says, “Solid joys and lasting treasure” are what await Zion’s children. This joy is promised to those who lay hold of Christ by faith. It doesn’t come through good behavior. It doesn’t come from being woke or based. It comes to us through Christ, who sought us and bought us to be His holy bride.

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Marriage Snarls (Get Married & Stay Married #4)

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INTRODUCTION

Most folks enjoy their ruts. They find a way of doing things, and that’s the way it should be done. But occasionally, along comes some technological innovation, or some brilliant genius. The way you’ve always done things is suddenly upended, and you can’t imagine ever doing it the old way again. Christ’s life, death, and resurrection was the epitome of completely changing how to do things. Christian marriage, then, should have a similar effect. As people see your marriage, they should be left scratching their heads going, “I’ve never seen it done this way before, but I want that.”

THE TEXT

Put on therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, bowels of mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, longsuffering; Forbearing one another, and forgiving one another, if any man have a quarrel against any: even as Christ forgave you, so also do ye. […] Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them (Col. 3:12-13;18-19).

SUMMARY OF THE TEXT

Unity in human society is impossible without Christ’s atonement. The people of God are to wear the uniform; the uniform is Christ and His righteousness. We must note the flow of Paul’s thought. Your affections must rest in Christ on high (3:1-4). You must fight to the death against evil desires and deeds, and put off all the rowdiness of the sinful nature (3:5-8). That is who you once were, but you aren’t that now.

You are chosen, beloved, and holy. This in turn leads to a particular way of doing things; a way that is profoundly counter cultural, to every culture not built on Christ. This looks like large-heartedness. Kindness. Humility. Meekness. You have a long fuse (v12). Along with this comes a clear cut way of dealing with violations of this holy way of living: forbearance or forgiveness (v13). Covering or confronting. All of this is to be done in imitation of the Love of God (v13b-17). This is how true community is formed. God, in Christ, has forgiven you, so you forgive others. Forgive us our debts, as we we forgive those who are indebted to us.

Nevertheless, a besetting sin of Christians is thinking that we could be very holy if it weren’t for all the people. So, Paul locates the playing field for us. This Christ-like way of doing things should be seen first and foremost in the life of a Christian marriage. Wives are to array themselves under their own husbands, for it is fitting (v18, Cf. v17). Husbands are to love their wives, without harboring or causing bitterness (v19).

LEMON JUICE IN THE PAPER CUT

It shouldn’t escape your notice that Paul’s instruction for wives & husbands is in the context of this “new way of being human” in Christ. The patience, humility, and sacrificial love described are not just nice plays drawn up on the chalkboard. This play is to be executed “in game”.

But where are wives & husbands most likely to be tested in their endeavor to be Christlike but in the failures of their spouse? It is easy to be sweet, kind, and cheerful when everything is sunny. But what about when she’s doesn’t obey her husband’s decision? Or when he thoughtlessly neglects to tell her he’ll be home late from work? When she does an end-around on her husband, getting the in-laws to take her side? When he gets cranky about sexual regularity?

This is why, in order for a marriage to go the distance, both husband & wife must put on Christ. They must imitate His forgiveness towards them in their forgiveness to each other. This won’t be easy. Without divine grace, you will be unable to give grace.

A husband who doesn’t love his wife well, or a wife who routinely disregards her husband’s authority will provoke the other to fill up the relational garage with boxes full of aired (and unaired) grievances. Things get really bad when his box ends up on her side of the garage. But where will a wife need to most likely extend forgiveness but when her husband fails to provide the love he ought? Where will a husband most need to forgive but where she runs roughshod over him?

So, Paul’s command to Christians in general, and then applying it more directly to married couples, rings loud and clear: forbear or forgive. Let it slide, or confess/confront it. Either way, you aren’t ignoring the sin or offense, you are dealing with it as Christ commands. You must not, however, wait until your relational garage could be featured on an episode of Hoarders. Keep it tidy, don’t let grievances pile up.

BONFIRE OF JOY

This “live differently” project must be spearheaded by husbands. Husbands should be a bonfire of joy in the midst of their home. Husbands, you set the tone. You provide the warmth. You are your home’s brightness. The family should want to gather around you, not because you are such a narcissist, but because you are a bonfire of joy in Christ and joy in them. This means more than just “be there.” It means “be there, and be joyful.”

James warns that ungodly ruckuses begin through wrong desires, disordered affections (Jas. 4:1-10). We see this in toddlers, and then pretend we adults are too advanced for such petty rivalry. But husbands, your wife is not your competitor, she is your helper. You lay down your life, that by God’s grace He might raise you up into great glory. You work your tail off in sacrificial toil, while humming a joyful tune through it all. You bring the irrepressible joy, and your wife will gladly crown that joy.

IN-LAWS, MONEY, INTIMACY, KIDS

Now, it almost goes without saying, but the greatest arenas of provocation in marriage usually center around a small group of issues. Like clockwork, marriage issues arise around in-laws, money, intimacy, and child-rearing. In a majority of instances, conflict can usually be avoided through the kindness that is clear communication.

Write it down. Explain to the in-laws where the boundaries are. Put it on the schedule. Implement a solid budgeting tool. Get on the same page regarding discipline and child-rearing issues. Too many couples assume their spouse is a mind-reader.  Then are disappointed when they discover this isn’t the case. But in all these areas, it will take mutual forbearance (and forgiveness) to work through the presenting challenges. Again, much of it can be relieved by interacting with clear lines (writing it down, scheduling, frank conversations), instead of vague shrugs or telepathy.

GOLDEN RULE, GOLDEN MARRIAGE

Many couples are wonderful people to their friends, co-workers, and colleagues. But when it comes to their marriage they are constantly aggravated and aggravating. Christ’s way of doing things should be jaw-dropping to the world around us. You once walked this way, but now you have put off the evil scheme of rivalry (Col. 3:7-8). Or as Paul says in another place, “And such were some of you: but ye are washed, but ye are sanctified, but ye are justified in the name of the Lord Jesus, and by the Spirit of our God (1 Cor. 6:11).”

Christ bears with your many failures, sins, flaws, and faults. He does not treat you as you deserve. But this doesn’t mean He doesn’t deal with your sin. He has made a way for you to be finally and fully forgiven. Not only that, but His Spirit is at work in you to subdue all remaining corruption. Look to Him, and then do as you’d be done by.

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Heirs Together (Get Married & Stay Married #3)

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INTRODUCTION

Waiting for something good is a strange mixture of pain & pleasure. Its agony mixed with expectancy. Christmas morning. A brisket. A bonus check. The wedding day. The birth of a child. The Eternal God placed us in time, which necessarily means waiting. This is poignantly true for engaged couples longing for their wedding day, or a single hoping for a good mate. But marriage isn’t the destination, it’s a waypoint. God wants to teach us to both rejoice in contentment for current blessings, while faithfully awaiting future glories.

THE TEXT

Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered (1 Peter 3:7).

SUMMARY OF THE TEXT

Peter has instructed wives to sweetly submit to their husbands. Doing so may win even unbelieving husbands to the faith (1 Pt. 3:1-2 ). How much more of a blessing this will be to a believing husband? A wife’s manner of meekness & quietness is of great price & very precious in God’s sight (1 Pt. 3:3-4). Holy women of old set a wonderful example for godly women in all ages: their trust in God was manifested by obedience to their own husbands. A godly woman is to be fearless & faithful in good works (1 Pt. 3:5-6).

Peter then turns his attention to husbands, and admonishes them to not be blockheads. The wife’s duty of submission should be sweetened by an ocean of her husband’s love & wisdom. He is to be continually present. He is to be prudent. He is to enthrone her with honor. He shouldn’t think of her like camping gear; she’s fine china. Of utmost importance, they are heirs together of the grace of life.

Paul warned (Cf. 1 Cor. 7:32-35) that marriage could become an impediment to religious service, if gone about with mindless carnality. Here Peter doesn’t contradict that warning, but instead affirms & clarifies it. If a husband & wife dwell together rightly the prayers they offer (whether separately, jointly, or with the congregation) won’t be hindered.

Strife and division is strictly forbidden (Jas. 3:14), and called an abomination (Pro. 6:19). How much more in the sanctuary of marriage should there be unity? The squabbling & fights that fill many marriages is a clear impediment to prayer. It’s hard to sincerely worship God when you just ripped into your spouse with a string of nasty complaints or curses.

This text also serves as an inoculation against the rampant individualism of our culture. A husband & wife are heirs together. Of course, your marital status doesn’t determine your justification. But if you are married, your union with your spouse is impacted by being joint-heirs of grace (Cf. 3:1-2, 1 Cor. 7:14).

LOVE YOUR WIFE

The danger for many husbands is to come to love the idea of your wife. Loving the idea of your wife leads to a simmering resentment. She’s not living up to some ideal you’ve concocted in your imagination, and so you become a muttering grump of a husband. Distant, dissatisfied, and dishonoring to your wife. Crushing her, instead of lifting her up. In a word, the opposite of Peter’s instruction.

In one place, Paul taught, “Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them (Col. 3:19).” This is a more succinct version of Peter’s teaching. Husbands, you must love this woman who has cast her entire life into your hands, for better or for worse. Paul’s warning is an intriguing one. Some render it as do not be harsh, others render it as not to be bitter against the wife. The traffic flows both ways here. Say he’s a grumble-muffin towards his wife, his presence fills the house with too much bleach, becoming a cause of bitterness in her. He is to both refrain from being bitter, and being a cause for bitterness. He is to not be harsh, nor harbor harsh thoughts towards his wife.

Substituting loving your wife, with loving an idol in the shape of your wife will inevitably lead to ungodly anger. Angry husbands (particularly if they are Christians) can get quite clever in the way they express or hide their anger. Don’t pride yourself that you’ve become more clever at hiding your anger or frustration at your wife. Rather, expunge that anger at the first sign. Love her. Draw her into your life. Cherish her, and dignify her by bringing her to stand by your side through thick and thin. She’s your glory.

HIS QUEEN & HER CROWN

This leads to address what many wives commonly misconstrue. Particularly in our feminist age. To admonish husbands in the above way, is not to absolve women of any duty to grow in grace & glory. But rather it is to highlight that as a husband surrounds his wife with houses & bank accounts & cupboards & cribs filled with his manifested love, she is to become a fruitful vine in this greenhouse of his love. The temptation for many women is to nit-pick their husband, criticize how he leads, question his every move, and spend her attention on matters outside her household.

To quote a pastor of a previous era, a wife who embraces Scripture’s teaching on what a godly wife is, is nothing short of a queen & a crown to her household: “Her spirit gives the home its atmosphere. Her hands fashion its beauty. Her heart makes its love. And the end is so worthy, so noble, so divine, that no woman who has been called to be a wife, and has listened to the call, should consider any price too great to pay, to be the light, the joy, the blessing, the inspiration of a home (J.R. Miller).”

A wife has the capacity to inspire her husband to be greater than he’d ever imagined, achieve more than he ever thought, and grow beyond his largest hopes. Or she can tear it all down (Pro. 14:1). A husband must build a bulwark of love around his wife, and she should fill that castle with glory, peace, and joy. Wives, make it your aim to regularly adopt JR Miller’s advice and, “Whisper a new word of courage to his heart.”

THE GRACE OF LIFE

The splendor of marriage is such that Christians have been tempted to turn it into a sacrament. Some interpret the Apostle Peter’s words here as ground for such a view. But Christ isn’t imparted or administered to us in marriage. Rather, He is displayed. He’s showcased as a couple walk in the Spirit’s unity. To be an heir requires long-suffering. Waiting. In Baptism & the Supper we truly receive Christ. In marriage we’re taught too long for the fullness of our inheritance. Husbands & wives you either partake of these things in a wonderful and unique togetherness, or else invite the curses of grace received in vain.

God, in Christ, has made you a partaker of His divine nature. Christ has received all things as His inheritance, and He has given you the Spirit. The Spirit leads you into all truth. He takes from Christ and gives to you. This is so you can give thanks for past faithfulnesses, walk uprightly in this present moment, and long with evangelical faith for the High Countries.

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As An Army with Banners (Get Married & Stay Married #2)

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INTRODUCTION

We turn now to see what instruction the Word of God gives us as it regards young women. Perhaps more than any other demographic in our current environment, young women are beset with draconian lies. All of which will lead to some degree of unfruitfulness & heartbreak for those who adopt the world’s thinking. In God’s Word, young women are held in high honor, while also called to high holiness.

THE TEXT

Who is she that looketh forth as the morning, fair as the moon, clear as the sun, and terrible as an army with banners? (Song of Songs 6:10).

SUMMARY OF THE TEXT

In Solomon’s song of love, we find numerous veiled descriptions of the unveiled glory of the love between a husband & his bride. In this verse were allowed a glimpse of sanctified feminine glory.

What did the Beloved see when he beheld his chosen bride? He saw a new day dawn. He saw the creation of a new world; evening & morning, and it was good. He saw Sun, Moon, and Stars. In gazing upon her, he beheld a coming heavenly host of covenant-keeping offspring. Rank upon rank of saints would come from her bearing & nurturing. Indeed, by her host of virtues & charms his affections have been captured. This description gives daughters of the Lord something to emulate. Adorned outwardly and inwardly with a host of glorious virtues.

THE MAKING OF VOWS

The besetting sin of modern American’s is individualism. Nowhere is this more evident than in how women are taught to view themselves. A daughter has authority, but she’s also under authority (Num. 30:3-5). The point here is that a daughter can lawfully make vows, but her vows are not like the unalterable law of the Medes and Persians. Her vows are lawful, but not absolute. If her father, or later her husband, were to overrule her vow, she’s not broken her vow.

Further, this arrangement keeps her from the folly of a rash vow. A young woman would be guarded from some sweet-talker who coaxed her into a “secret engagement”. This also shows us that her father has authority over his daughter’s romantic commitments.

Eager suitors should bear in mind that they ought not treat young women as if they are autonomous islands. If he desires her to marry him, submit to his headship, receive her respect, the first step in commanding her respect is for him to show respect & deference to her father’s authority over her. Rejecting both recreational dating & hook-up culture should mean that a young couple’s approach to romance be bounded by Biblical wisdom. This means not treating authority as if it’s a dirty word.

UNDER AUTHORITY

Too often, though, instead of replacing the world’s model of two fools messing around, conservative Christians replace it with six fools making a hash of things. Overbearing moms, overly scrupulous parents, tight-fisted dads, poor communication of expectations, standards, guidelines, and throw in a few younger siblings doing their (very experienced) 2¢ and you have curdled the relationship from the get-go.

A young woman should not view her duty to submit to her father, and eventually a husband, as a cumbersome obstacle to her life. Fathers in particular, and parents in general, should set out to ensure that their authority in a daughter’s life is one of blessing. It will only be a blessing if it’s marked by our Heavenly Father’s generosity. He piles on the grace, the love, the protection, and the gifts and yet also refuses to indulge our follies, vices, or the wolves who would devour us.

In short, there are four options for a single woman in regards to authority. Being under authority is inescapable, but that is the case for us all. There’s lawful but ungodly authority: a miserly father, who bears rule with an iron fist, or has long ago abdicated. There’s unlawful & ungodly authority: the modern feminist mindset which deludes with phantom autonomy. There’s unlawful & godly authority: she might find a fine young man, but he isn’t her authority. Finally, lawful and godly authority: a loving father who cherishes her, protects her, and guides her (and any suitor who comes along) from the structure of his faithful home into her own godly home.

PASSIVE ≠ INACTIVE

So, while it’s a young woman’s duty to submit, first to her father’s leadership and protection (as long as it’s Scriptural), and then to consent to the advances of an eligible suitor, this doesn’t mean that she’s to loll about in idleness. She isn’t relieved of duty, activity, purpose, or industry. The description which Scripture gives of holy women is that of vigorous action even while under submission. Sarah, Ruth, Rahab, Tamar, Jael, Proverbs 31, Abigail, the daughters of Zelophehad, and Hannah depict this is a variety of situations (some with godly heads, others with ungodly). While in relation to the lawful authority over them they are in a passive position of receiving, what is given into their hands to do is to be done with vigor and joy.

Modern thinking wants young women to be content only with being lawmakers unto themselves. The insistence upon the “my body, my choice” paradigm, along with the unquestioning affirmation of every choice, has taught America’s daughters to dwell in a state of constant vulnerability. They aren’t protected. They’re the prey of carnal men who will use them to gratify their endless lust & greed. The feminist arrangement works out quite well for both the lecherous creep & the $500 haircut CEO.

An unmarried woman shouldn’t adopt the notion that self-fulfillment is found in some journey of self-discovery out in the wilds of corporate America, or in the woods of some Yoga resort where you heal from all the trauma of growing up in the most prosperous, care-free time in all history. A young women should be preparing herself as if she is about to be hired to be a caretaker of a thousand acre vineyard & winery. Thus, she should be cultivating savvy wordsmithing; she should commit dozens of delicious recipes to memory; she should understand a profit & loss spreadsheet; and she should probably work to become a whiz at making grass stains disappear from jeans.

Young women should understand that they are the producers of the world’s most precious commodity: children made in the image of God. This is why the OT Law put severe sanctions on the craven lusts of men, in order to protect the chastity of daughters. This is why daughters were not sent into Israel’s wars. Preparing for motherhood isn’t preparation for obscurity. It’s preparation for bearing & rearing a host of godly saints, trained up to love & fear the Lord all their days. She raises humans who will make advances in science, art, discovery, and justice, while also fulfilling our Lord’s assignment for the Church to bring this world under the dominion of Christ’s Word. Young mom’s have the opportunity to create a habitat in which the early years of their children are marked by joy, discipline, nurture, love, beauty, and peace. You are preparing to oversee the formation of tens of thousands of worshippers of the Lord Jesus. While you wait for a husband, you need not wait to become industrious.

IN WROUGHT GOLD

Returning to our text, a young woman preparing for marriage should bring to mind an army readying for battle. Your single years are the boot-camp & the staging area for a Gospel invasion of the remaining outposts of evil & darkness. Marriage and motherhood is where those exercises are put into action. Moms do in miniature what the Church does at full scale.

Scripture prohibits women from military combat, while simultaneously evoking military imagery for the glory of a woman. This is not accidental. The war is not out there where the guns are, the war is whether mankind will worship the Risen Christ.

And here is where our theology meets our living. The Church receives Christ’s love, and is made lovely. Your love is made perfect in Christ & by Christ (1 Jn. 4:17). The bride is arrayed in wrought gold, fine needlework, and beaming with glory within (Ps. 45:13). In Christ, God has arrayed the saints in golden robes of righteous. This is all of grace.

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