The Covenant Home #4

INTRODUCTION:

We should recall that a firm understanding of the husband’s federal responsibilities does not diminish in any way a woman’s personal responsibility to be a godly wife, but rather provides a firm foundation for her.

THE TEXT:

“An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, but she who causes shame is like rottenness in his bones” (Prov. 12:4).

A TRUE HELP NEEDED:

Many women tend to assume that their intentions are the measurement of what they have contributed to a marriage. Because God created them to be a help to their husbands, they have every intention of being a help. But help is measured by the Word of God, and not by a woman’s intentions. We might be reminded of C.S. Lewis’ observation of a particular kind of women, i.e. the kind of woman who lived for “others.” You could tell who the “others” were by their hunted expression.

If this causes panic, do not address it by coming to your husband and asking, “Am I help to you? Really?” In a congregation this size, it is safe to say that some of you are not a help, but rather a nuisance. e live in a sinful world, and sin gets into marriages. If this concerns you, then look to the mirror of the Word. You may be able to manipulate your husband with your tears, but the Word remains constant. This is obviously not a sentimental approach to marriage, but it may help if what is needed is true repentance.

A WOMAN TO BE PRAISED:

First, a godly woman knows how to respect her husband. When God requires
our respective duties of us, he does not require that women love their husbands. Of course as Christians we are all to love our neighbors, which includes a woman’s husband. But when Scripture tells wives to focus on particular duties, what is mentioned to wives is respect, and not love. In Titus 2:3-5, the older women are told to teach the younger women to be “husband-lovers,” which should be rendered as “into husbands.” The word for love refers to a warm affection.

Second, a godly woman manages her home well—“. . . that they admonish the young women to . . . be discreet, chaste, homemakers, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be blasphemed” (Titus 2:3-5). “She watches over the ways of her household, and does not eat the bread of idleness” Prov. 31:27). A godly wife has

managerial responsibilities and must develop and cultivate managerial skills. She is the

executive officer of the home.

Third, a godly woman is mistress of her tongue—“She opens her mouth with wisdom, and on her tongue is the law of kindness” (Prov. 31:26). Many women tear their homes apart with their niggling, whining, complaining, resentful comments, carping, and criticizing. hen those in your household think of your words, does the phrase “law of kindness” come to mind?

Next, a godly woman is sexually responsive: “I am my beloved’s, and his desire is toward me” (Song of Songs 7:10). A woman should be a locked garden, which no one may approach but her husband. But the woman should not be a safe, one who changes the combination every other day or so. Women who are difficult to approach sexually are women who want their husbands to wander. This does not give him any right to wander, but we all have enough temptations already.

Fifth, a godly woman shops wisely and well. Her husband must provide her with the wherewithal. When he has done so, “she brings her food from afar” (Prov. 31:14). Shopping for groceries and clothing is not her entertainment; it is her vocational responsibility. Some women are good at it, while others are wasteful.

After this, a godly woman is a good cook— “She also rises while it is yet night, and provides food for her household . . .” (Prov. 31:15). As the executive of the home, she is aware of the importance of good food.

Seventh, a godly woman is theologically educated—“Let a woman learn . . . (1 Tim. 2:11 ). We sometimes wrongly emphasize that women should learn in all submission. The

point is that Paul requires them to learn, and to do so in a certain way.

Eighth, a godly woman respects masculine leadership—“Let your women keep silent in the churches, for they are not permitted to speak; but they are to be submissive, as the law also says. And if they want to learn something, let them ask their own husbands at home; for it is shameful for women to speak in church” (1Cor. 14:34-35; cf. 1 Tim. 2:11-15; Prov. 31:20). In our time, it is particularly important for women to resist the lies of feminism as dangerous heresy.

But ninth, a godly woman s involved in the mission of the Church—“And I urge you also, true companion, help these women who labored with me in the gospel, with Clement also, and the rest of my fellow workers, whose names are in the Book of Life” (Phil. 4:3; cf. Rom. 16:1; Acts 18:26). Those who say that evangelism is for the men, or that Bible studies are, or apologetics, don’t get it.

Tenth, a godly woman dresses nicely—“Her clothing s fine linen and purple” (Prov.

31:22). Modesty and decorum do not require dressing in a mattress sack. And with all the

references to perfume in the Song, a woman should take care to smell good.

Eleventh, a godly woman honors her husband with her hair—“For a man indeed ought not to cover his head, since he is the image and glory of God; but woman is the glory of man” (1 Cor. 11:7). A godly woman should know her hair is a daily sermon on how her husband is doing.

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Gospel Intentionality

The Mission at Home

Evangelism begins at home. Paul argues in 1 Tim. 3:4-5 and Tit. 1:6 that the faithfulness of our own children is a prerequisite or foundation for any other teaching that we will do. This is true for individuals and it is true for churches on a corporate level. To certain extent, successful evangelism within families would make all other evangelism unnecessary.

A Post-Millenial Faith

But Scripture teaches that the Gospel is intended to spread to all nations. And in order for the Gospel to go to other nations, it must go to other families, to people other than our own children. Faithfulness to the Great Commission requires that we disciple people other than our own families. A rejection of this truth is what got the Jews of the first century into trouble. Judaizing was a rejection of a world-discipling Gospel. Therefore, while discipling our families and ordering our houses is critical. It is not the end. We as a church, need to be an evangelizing body. We are here to spread the Gospel. The gospel is a river that runs, not a marsh – backed up and in need of draining.

Evangelizing as a Body

To do this rightly, we must understand our role as a body (1 Cor. 12). Not all of us are called to act as the mouth. But when the mouth speaks, all the body is invested in what the mouth says. If the mouth goes talking trash to a biker gang on a Saturday night, the rest of the body is going to end up involved. So when a part of the body is evangelizing, the rest of the body is invested in that work.

Gospel Intentionality

Regardless of our individual giftings, we should learn to live with our minds and hearts set on discipling the nations – Gospel Intentionality. This begins with prayer. Look to expand your fellowship, where it is natural. Who has God put in front of you? Failing to understand that we minister as a body can place a lot of misguided pressure on saints within the church. We are not all gifted in the same ways. But we are all gifted to work together to the same end.

Evangelism as a Body

Strong families and a strong church do not have to be in tension with living evangelistically. These things not only qualify us to preach, they should actually be our greatest strength in evangelism. For instance, our world is characterized by father hunger. And we, of all the people on the Palouse, have fathers. Our world is homeless. And we have homes. Our world is hopeless. And we have hope. We don’t need to act that much different to proclaim the Gospel. We need to be ourselves, the body that God is making us into, in front of the world. This is Gospel intentionality.

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