Provide Biblical Instruction & Assign Practical Homework

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If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. (1 Jn 1:9)

And Peter said to them, “Repent and be baptized every one of you in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins, and you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit. (Act 2:38)

Introduction

Letting a person know what the Gospel is, in a way that fits their situation, is one of the goals of Biblical counseling. Let’s suppose your presentation has as its fruit the person’s cautious or even enthusiastic acceptance. Now what? What do you do with the counselee next? There is a sense in which you may have a new Christian on your hands, but you may also simply have a Christian who has learned new things about himself. What do you do now?

Confession of Sin & Repentance

We’ve already said something about these two terms and will again in the coming talks, but it needs to be mentioned again here that the first change that needs to occur in the life of the counselee is to confess their sin to God and anyone else sinned against, and to commit herself, before God, to change

Change

Some say that change takes a long time. But this is mostly false. To go from being a rank unbeliever to becoming like Christ in every way, does take a long time. But each step of the way is instantaneous. Repentance does not take a long time; it only takes a change in mind and action. Making permanent change in a life filled with habits and even addictions, may take a long time. But making a single choice, right now and behaving, thinking, and feeling differently takes only a change of mind and action. It can and should happen as soon as the spirit of God convicts you and you realize it is sinful.

It is also tempting to think that new thoughts or ways of thinking constitute change. But this is an error as well. Change is only change if something different happens. Thinking new thoughts, or even being excited about new thoughts are not change unless something different actually happens as a result of the new thoughts.

So there is a sense in which change happens slowly, but also in which it happens quickly. But change isn’t change unless something changes.

Develop a Plan of Attack

We’ve chatted with the counselee, determined why they think they are there (presenting problems), sought and found the deeper underlying issues (heart desires), have confessed the sin, and are ready to proceed. This is the ‘turning to’ part of repentance. There is a sense in which confession might be considered the beginning of the turning away process and the turning to part is what counseling is really about. Everything up to this point might better be classified as evangelism. It is important, at this point, to have in mind where you want to take the counselee. What is your end game? What do you want the counselee to be doing or be when everything is finished? This will be done in the context of what God wants for the person and you need to keep that consciously in mind, or the problems of the day will most certainly distract you and sidetrack the process. At the same time, you do not want to abandon the counselee’s presenting problem. You don’t want her to think you did the old “bait and switch” on her. She needs to constantly see the connection between God’s answer and her problem(s).

Responsibility

Who is responsible for what? Is God responsible, or is the counselee responsible? This question is one of the first ones that should come up in counseling. If you are going to help the counselee live with God, she needs to know what God expects of her and let everything else go. Generally, people are either overly responsible, irresponsible, or simply confused about the whole process.

Who or Where Is Jesus in All this?

Because the changes in counseling come from God as the counselee spends time with God throughout the week, homework should be extremely heavy on Bible work. But it is not simply bible reading, it includes assignments that include prayer, ministry, reading in specific areas of Scripture, and involvement with others in the faith.

Personal Identity

One of the goals in counseling is to help the person being counseled remember who they are. If left to themselves, they begin to identify with what they have been doing, who they know, who or what they trust, and even who they have convinced themselves they are (divorced, addicted, depressed, ADD, Co-Dependent, etc). What we need to do is to help them receive their self-understanding from Scripture and through the lens of God. These other sources have eliminated God from the picture and the counselee believes her sources before she believes God’s word about who she is. What does the Bible say about who we are? (2 Pet. 1:3-9). You belong to Christ (Rom. 6:1; 7:4; 8:9; 1 Cor. 15:23; Gal. 5:24). We are not sinners—in whatever way it manifests itself, we are Christians.

Involve Others

It is important that you understand that you are not the savior. Jesus is the only savior. He has provided you as a means to point others to him, but he has also provided others to help in the process as well. You are not the one producing change in the counselee, but you do provide a kind of accountability for her that helps her on her way. You direct her path to Christ and your presence helps her along the path, but so does the presence of others. With this in mind you should think about how you might organize those around the counselee to help in the process. Accountability, according to Paul Tripp (Instruments, p. 270, 271), provides: structure, guidance, assistance, encouragement, warning, and ongoing help.

It is Finished

Knowing when the counseling process is over is a very important question. I’ve found that most often the counseling process is over when the person stops coming to meet with me. It might also end in church discipline in a negative direction or when the person is doing well with the Lord and doesn’t need to come any more. Doing well means…

Overall, they are able to consistently glorify God. This shows itself when:

The reason they came to me in the first place has been alleviated and they are set free to worship God without bondage.
They are studying the Bible on their own, with a joy and a zeal to know God and to serve him more consistently and effectively.
They read other, non-biblical books, with the goal to know God and to serve him more consistently and effectively.
They talk with others about God: what they are learning, who God is.
They are thrilled to be involved in worshipping God with the people of God, both in corporate Sunday worship and in small group worship.
They are actively involved in ministering to others.

This paper on Homework came from Bob Somerville

WHAT MAKES A GOOD HOMEWORK ASSIGNMENT?

A good homework assignment should assure that the counselee is working in all of the following areas:

Regular Bible Reading with applicational journaling or at least application.
Reading in Proverbs
Read one chapter per day in Proverbs.
Record one verse that stands out to you.
Record a sentence on why it is important to you.
Write out a prayer asking God to accomplish that verse in your life.
Bring in your journal so that I can be encouraged by what God is teaching you.
Reading in the Gospels
Read one chapter per day in the Gospel of Mark this week.
Keep a journal answering the following questions related to your daily reading:
- What chapter or verses you read.
- What did you learn about Jesus from your reading?
- How should what you learned help you in your walk with Jesus?
- Write a one sentence prayer thanking God for some aspect of what you learned or asking Him to help you grow in your walk with Him as a result of what you learned.
Discovering Wonderful Things (DWT – Ps. 119:18) type of memorization with application and praying back to God.
The counselee is exhibiting a heart issue of self-centeredness therefore I will plan to assign.
Read one chapter per day in the book of Philippians.
- Record what portion you read for the day. Keep a journal answering ONE of the following questions related to your daily reading:
  - What did this passage say about God?
  - What does it say about the message of the Gospel?
  - What is one thing from this passage for which I can thank God?
  - Is there a sin to avoid? Is there a command to obey?
  - What is a specific teaching that can be understood from this passage?
  - What did this passage say about putting off sin or putting on righteousness?
  - How will you apply what you have learned from this passage in your life today?
  - From this passage what is one thing I should ask God to Help me with?
  - Write down a specific application you will make in your life today as a result of your reading.
- Read Phil 2:3-11 every day.
- Meditate on and do a DWT on Phil 2:3-5.
- Each day as you read your chapter in Philippians look for what that chapter teaches about Paul’s view of self and serving Christ and others.
Church Attendance and application of the message.
Attendance At Church
Attend church this Sunday. Hebrews 10:23-25
Take notes on the message.
Record one application you can make from the message on a 3×5 card. State the application in one sentence. On the back of the card write out the application as a prayer asking God to accomplish this application in your life this week. Carry the card with you and pray it back to God at least once a day. Use it as a book marker in your Bible and pray it to God each time you read the word.
Look for one person you can greet and show kindness to before or after the service.
Small group accountability.
Usually some collateral reading that supports the issue being addressed by the counselee.
It is good to give a reading assignment but you need to give the counselee more specific responsibility with regards to the reading. Not just to read the book but how can he be a doer of the Word. Example – Read Chapter 1 in The Book Assigned
Highlight the 10 most important statements from the chapter.
Come prepared to discuss why each of the statements you highlighted were important to you.
Choose the most important statement for you to apply in your life right now.
List three specific steps you can take to start practicing that truth this week.
- Practice those steps daily.
- Record the results in your journal and bring them in.

This makes the assignment really practical and measurable.

Read through Love Life for Every Married Couple by Ed Wheat with your wife.
- Spend 10 minutes per day 5 days per week reading together.
- Take turns reading or allow the one who likes to read the best to read.
- Continually discuss what you read by stating: “I like that, what do you think? or “I’m not sure I agree with that, What do you think?” Do not argue just listen to each other.
- Highlight the items on which you agree and put a ? mark by items over which you disagree.
- Write one statement you both agree on from each chapter on a 3×5 card for each of you and review it every day. Put a prayer on the back of the card asking God to accomplish in your life what the statement declares.
Ongoing emphasis on hope.
1. Give me a verse for ongoing hope!
2. Consider this idea for instilling hope:
Have 3×5 cards with you in the counseling session.
Write out a specific verse on Hope that you give to the counselee during the session. I.e. 1 Cor 10:13, Heb 13:5.
Write out 1 Cor 10:13 on a 3×5 card during the session and on the back write out a prayer like this, ‘Father I thank you that you are faithful and that all our problems are common to man. I thank you that you never give us a temptation, test or trail that is greater than we can handle. I thank you that you always provide a way through the problem so that we can handle it. Lord help me to pray in the midst of each trail for the way out.’
Then give them the card and ask them to review the verse 3 times per day and each time they review the verse pray it back to God.
This keeps hope before them in a practical way every day throughout the day.
This idea can be repeated with a new verse each week that they are building in to an arsenal of verses on hope. They can review 15-20 verses on cards a day in just a few minutes and yet it will keep their minds set on the hope we have in Christ.
1. HOPE AND ROMANS 8:28
Memorize & do a DWT on Rom 8:28-29.
- Pray these verses back to God every day asking Him to give you hope in that God is at work for good both temporally and eternally in your life right now. Ask Him to enable you to genuinely believe that He is working all things together for good.
Read Romans 8 (the whole chapter) every day this week.
- Journal 1thing each day in the chapter that gives you hope.
  - Write this as a prayer of thanksgiving to God and pray it back to God.
- Journal 1 thing each day that He could be teaching you through your trial to make you more like Jesus.
  - Write out and pray a one sentence prayer asking God to grow you in that area.

Read Christ and Your Problems

Highlight the 10 most important statements from the booklet.
Come prepared to discuss why each of the statements you highlighted was important to you.
Choose the most important statement for you to apply in your life right now.
List three specific steps you can take to start practicing that truth this week.
Practice those steps daily.
Record the results in your journal and bring them in.